What Does “Winning'' Look Like?

What does the term “winning” mean to you? Does it mean coming in first in a race or getting ahead of everyone else in a competition or picking the winning lottery number? Today, many people are using the term “winning” in a broader and more profound way.  The usage of the term lately seems to be more tied to doing your personal best than it is to besting others-- At least I hope that’s what most people mean when they say, “I am winning”.  For example, when someone feels they look particularly good in an outfit or hairstyle or they just woke up on the right side of the bed that morning, they may say that they are “winning” or looking their best today.

Imagine if most people looked at winning as doing their personal best in whatever way is meaningful and important to them rather than feeling as if they must be better than or have more than others in order to feel you have achieved something. Setting personal goals that are important to you and taking meaningful, step by step actions to achieve your goals is definitely winning. 

To really win in life requires that we live outside of the matrix of fear, hate and self-doubt that seems to be cultivated by all of the negative messages from multiple sources that invade our emotional space via traditional and social media.  When the message of, “it’s a dog–eat—dog”, lack of abundance, survival of the fittest, kind of world and you just don’t fit, pervades our consciousness the deleterious consequences are evident.  They are evident in the level of division and conflict that has sharply increased in our nation so much so that social discourse has broken down to “us versus them”.  

With all the lessons of history to inform us, we know that this present state of affairs is not one where we are winning as a society. When society sinks to such a level that we become hyper competitive about everything based on fear and other negative emotions, we cannot get the best from everyone because too much energy is expended on the thought of losing jobs, power and safety rather than on creating opportunity and really winning. 

On an individual level our focus and energy should be directed at making ourselves the best we can be to succeed in the current reality of rapidly increasing changes in technology that change the workplace and the skills necessary to succeed there.  What other people are doing, as long as they are not personally harming you, should be of no concern to you because when you are truly winning you understand that what you think, say and do is really what is having the greatest impact on your life.  Others can negatively impact you if you internalize their negativity and lower yourself to respond in kind. They clearly are not winning when they resort to fear-based behavior and neither are you.

 It does take a level of self-awareness to detect when we are not being or doing our best or are being pulled off track by outside forces. Therefore, to succeed at work or in life in general we must be mindful of our intention to always be winning in the most expanded and evolved way possible.  

Best wishes for your success, however you define it.

Peace.

Carlotta Daniels-Randolph is a writer, educator and career and life coach. The Randolph Report is a weekly newsletter on politics, Black culture and career and professional development relevant to African Americans. Every new edition of the newsletter goes directly to your inbox.